2020

 My mum calling my name and looking for something while making coffee. Then she said she cannot find the coffee cover while staring at all the bottles. She said she forgot where she put it. It took me a while to figure out the cover was on top of another bottle. Camouflaged. I thought it fell somewhere. I takeaway food for my mum at home. While closing my eyes, my mum was looking for something again. She was having her breakfast and suddenly couldn’t find it. I bought a small sling over bag for her and passed it to her while she was eating. Then after a while her food disappeared. I helped her looked everywhere from the coffee table and in front of tv and also her bedroom. She went in to take things to put in the new bag. I couldn’t find it too. Kitchen also cannot find. The wantan just disappeared. Did dog came in and took it? In the end, she found it herself. She did her prayer at the small altar and took the food along with it. She places it at the table with the candles…. haha ...

 There were worried you are doing well so always find things to make troubles but all these years who has been the one taking and using the resources? Rent free, Utilities free, got workers to ask to do things for them. Wait, why you joined our family, all your problems become ours. Everytime got problem, we must understand you but I am sorry, most of the time when I was your age, I have to solve them myself. I also remember every year, both make new problems for us. Why when I was home, never complain I washed your whole family dish. Oh, is it because that time I didn’t make myself sick? Then pretend that I cannot work anymore like you did. So many acts. Why the money my Dad earned and what we all done need to let you spend. Yet, what you have earned, none go to us. Our parents’ money. Asked us to save, to work but to let you reap them? Please work harder like both of them lah until 65 years old like my mum then I didn’t want to hear your complains. At that time, someone complaine...

 Brought my mum to emart. Initially to find my Dad his newspaper. It was like 8pm and who still sell newspaper this late. Been everywhere but cannot find. We found they were selling Anlene Gold 5x. They give bone checking for calcium level. I have the highest and pretty good. The guy said everyone just borderline. I didn’t tell him I have been drinking Anlene or Coffee with Fresh Milk from McD usually. Or coffee with packaged milk. Anyway, mine was like green area with reading 1. Max is 2. Borderline is -1 but still good. Mum is medium. Yellow area. Maybe age. Dad has been tested low on Calcium as I suspected. Mum went for tooth extraction and they said that will cause calcium loss in some article. That’s when I started to buy milk but Dad also lactose intolerant. He is also having some med that I knew nothing about because he has been taking them himself. Only when he sick I started to ask and researched more when he went to emergency for a swollen arm. Pretty big one that the doc...

 It is how you treat a person when you have everything. I saw that part thankfully. Otherwise I will still be a fool in your eyes because you knew it quite well. What you are doing is coming to you. Be worried if there were more.

 Every time got problem asked me to sacrifice considered kind? What is try their best for you? meaning? when someone tried their best on you and you trampled those kindness, what does that make of you? When you tried your best for others, does it involve any advantage? if yes, that is not kindness. That is a transaction. I don’t see any try their best for you. Can you list out an example? I listed so many. Then you listed boiling water. Look down on my Mum to want to stop working at 65. Come on, what have you really done apart from the 3 meals, even now no need to cook for them, you still cooking leh. All these years my mum’s pocket money gone to the shop too. Make sure you wash your own plates in your old age. Wash your own laundry too. Make sure you keep your place clean. Make sure you don’t faint. If you can say a fake faint, I bet you have been faking it too or faking so many other things. If you did give more, then may God bless you. If you have taken more than you give, may G...

 I am still usable so they have been kind. Then after using done, they changed face. Just when their kid graduated, this person acted differently. I also reciprocated but still leave room for misunderstanding if there is any. Well, that time only the woman acted that way. Time passed, I still saw her reaction every time somebody like my Aunt or my Dad’s friend mentioned me. So don’t blame me if I gave you that face too. Cause I didn’t do it. I think you imagined that too.  After all those remarks to undermine me then after taking the advantage of us going back home, to say how much work was done for us to be home. The room I left them was in a fine condition. The room after they use like wreckage here and there. The only thing I never add to the room was curtain rail. Because that is expensive. That time we were saving money to buy the house and pay the loan. Everyone after moving in, can add air cond, add curtain and so on. Is it their own money? or borne from the company?...

 Dad was at his worst condition. Everything also got problem. Cholesterol, blood pressure, diabetes, joint & muscle pain, haemorrhoid, no teeth, bent knees and dried, bruised skin. To me, it was all weathered. Only his eyesight improved because he went for surgery. His hips also fine now after surgery. Knees however, he decided not to go. From long ago, he said his arms also painful. He went to doctor and get all sorts of medication. I wonder if you are being well taken care of, wouldn’t you be at a better shape? I couldn’t find the blood pressure measurement machine. The one I sent back since I got it for free from company because I am still working on site during covid period and I am not using it. I only seen it once in a picture. Suppose to help my Dad with measurements. The blood glucose bought by my older brother was already spoilt. I tried it last week and it wasn’t accurate anymore like only used few times and was in the shelf forever. It wasn’t accurate anymore a 2015 ...

 My mum is the most underrated contributor and most of her works go uncredited. If my mum is someone who does nothing, how will she knows so many things. She used to carry gas tank for cooking. She knows how the old gas tank worked. She drove a lorry and one time with me in it. Forgotten why she has to drive but while going down the hill, she forgotten how to stop. We were rolling down the hill with my soul nearly out of my body. In front of us, was the main road and then Shell and then Tutong River. There were a long queue of cars on the main road as the mosque also there and it was the busiest road ever. But she stopped in time and we were almost touching the car right in front of us. She knows how to fix a lamp and pipe. She knows how to sew. Mum sewed Dad’s underwear. He complained to me it was all torn and loose. Not one he can wear because it has been repaired many times… She is frugal. We used to have sewn underwear and pillows. In the end I bought like a dozen new ones for ...

 Wah. Somebody spent 100k to buy a Malaysia BYD car oh. Either rm or bnd. Well, what happened to the I worked so hard. I have no money. I am paying rm 1k for school fee every month? Free Loader saved all the money while Dad pays for all. Debt also pay by father. Every cook just cook 3 meals per day ok already. then get free house and free car later.  Oh wait, the other Toyota Vios also we paid for the deposit BND3k. Maybe you do get what you deserve. No money to see doctor. True colors.

 This morning, I went out with Dad to Danau. Then to Bunut. Mostly to drive him there to oversee the status of the employees working on site.  Dad brought back a papaya and as usual I don’t cut it. If I cut, I would definitely clean. Today, Mum helped to cut the papaya. Dad liked it anyway. I went to wash my hand and saw the papaya skin on a plate near the kitchen sink. We need to rush out to Bunut so I left it there. After we were back, I worked a bit. Probably the free loaders above still didn’t like to see this scene. As always 小人. Then Dad wants to eat so I brought my parents out to eat. The female free loader talked to Dad about something in the kitchen. Normally Dad don’t kitchen unless to take water or to open or close the windows. At night, the two so called son and daughter in law would blame them for not closing the windows or doors. Eh! come on. Two elderly. Two people near fifties cannot close for them. What do they mean when they say they were taking care of paren...

 2 am, heard someone knocking. I thought the upstairs playing again. Our house got gate so definitely wouldn’t have anyone who will knock on our door. Turned out to be the door from upstairs to downstairs. Then my father’s eldest son knocking on the door then shouting to me to bring Dad to Miri now to see doctor cause worry he got pneumonia. Brunei to Miri custom, not open at this hour. From someone who often travel between don’t know meh? Or purposely act concern. Dad has the flu a day before we went to Miri 5 days ago. He has been coughing occasionally for a long time. The son only now ask to bring him see doctor. Dad since Monday has been coughing. He has been working with him for these two days and he never thought of it? Suddenly around 2am he remembered. While we were in Miri, I brought Dad to see his specialist but since he was there, he never really cough so he never asked him. I bought him cough syrup. Still coughing today. He can still scold me sometimes so I think he is ...

 Truth or Lie. Nothing can run away from God’s eye. God is forgiving but only to those who repent. A serpent is always a serpent. When people killed it, it is always innocent. Everybody is cruel to kill a serpent. How about the lives of those that were taken by this serpent? They don’t deserve mercy? When there are good things, they dared not share with us.  Dad went out to Telisai to take house measurements. Anyway as always. An assistant went with him. Not the first time anyway.  亏本别人还。赚到就拿先。 Dad has the money, instantly, this person already aimed for it. In here, out to him but he dared not let me know when he has it. Funny this month Dad didn’t ask me to bank in money to him. Previous month we have done twice. 花别人的钱，自己的钱就存起来。

 Somebody who has been receiving money once said. Only the poor keeps on giving money. The rich will be openly stingy. So giving money may make people who gave money sounds cheap. Especially when easy. Never give anyone money. What a great lesson I learnt late.