2020

可能平常见的人太少了。最近好多人都好奇怪。等着巴士，听到一个经过的车有人在大喊。。。 生活是不是都把人逼疯了。有时我想我是不是找错工作了。。。还有两个月就满了。。。如果满了至少现在就要找工作了吧。。。有个很不错的。之前错过了。可是不知道该不该申请。这里都还没有做完。。。也喜欢这里的人。

下午看到的。想不想风车。还有一些，这个有四个🌬️🌀🦭 懒不是免费的吗？为什么要偷？

昨天的梦好象卡了。梦到一半黑屏。可能喝了咖啡。可是平常都喝也没有这样。最不好的就是闹钟还没响就醒了。。。 昨天地铁坏，今天monorail坏。我还搭德士回来。。。不过也好。早一点到家。Puhlease! Hope everything goes smoothly.

Ever remember the careless mistakes we all made during school times. I never checked my answer after a maths test and I have made a careless calculation that I am was a few marks short from hundred. It was my favourite subject and probably the only subject I was good at. That was a hard blow. After that, I made sure I checked all the answer after finishing. Form 3, I can still double check all the answer but after Form 3, if I could finish doing, I am more than happy. The thing is, the self-confidence was so low that I would check on my calculator even if 1+1 is equal to 2. Thereby, my teacher laughed at me for that... As if hoping 1+1 is not 2 and the calculator will always be the right one. Just now, I did it again. I have forgotten what it was..... sigh..... I will probably not remember what I want to tell again... duh..... Ok. Done. 

人是无聊了

Keyboard warrior's keyboard checked. Another Jean checked. It is to make up for the pants that I spoiled two days ago. Just when I arrived at the office, I sat on a chair whereby the surface is grid-like and the  buttoned-up fake pocket button on the right side got plucked off leaving a hole a bit on the upper side of the bum. There is a flap that was together with the button. It just covers the hole a bit. I am not sure if the slit that the button goes through was big enough to see through. I tried to ensure my shirt was over the hole though at least to cover while I was not seated. It wasn't a good time. I was wondering should I just walk off to buy another pants but decided not to because we were busy. That went on for the rest of the day. A day to remember. The pants lasted 10 years. I bought it during my first job at 2011. Anyway, it was a bit tight around the waist so shouldn't have worn it at all. Although I am a bit heavier, my waist is a bit off only. I wonder if m...

享受简单偶尔玩游戏。其实人为什么要那么挣扎的去伤害彼此。挣扎的想要活在这个世界上。说也已经不重要了。给我的就是我的，不是我的，我不会去要。也许就算是我的不一定会永远属于我。那为什么一开始就不放手呢。到心动了才放手，痛得是自己。我做完我该做的我就会放手了。能不拖不欠是最好，要不然我已经尽力了。 也许是一场戏一场表演。都是有权有钱说的。倒数着时间的时候这些都不重要了。故事不用说也知道只是在看过程。 想离开是非之地。不做人类。可能当一天的狗吧。思想方面当个狗。开开心心过一天。烦人的事就不要找我了。之后，我要努力当蚂蚁。都可以咬人。 我想只是经历相同，其他巧合。

尽然减不了，就算了。┏(＾0＾)┛

Pun intended. In the adult world or say human life, there are no truth but professional lies. Well, most of the time unless you are new. Ham and cheese almost everytime. The cashier looked surprise there is a change. Had the tendency to just eat one thing out of a place. Some even guess correctly before I ordered... Then started laughing... 

While I got off the train, one song that the shuffling seldom get to, started playing. Sometimes, I would skip but I just decided to listen. It was around 11 or 11:30pm, I was walking home and this verse gave me a heart punch.  "when the night has been too lonely, and the road has been too long, and you feel that love is only for the lucky and the strong" I looked at the long pathway in front of me. That just so like the lyrics. I think the lyricist has been walking where I was walking. Hm. if you had been there, probably you will understand what she sang. The only thing that I feel differently was that, I wasn't lonely but I was walking home alone at night. Trying to reach before the clock strike 12. The rest is totally true.

看”书” 。字不在纸上了，还是书吗？ 电子书？？ hm 很久没有看书了。以前还会到图书馆看书。不过很久没有了。以前知道为什么我喜欢新加坡吗？就是每个mall,有一个图书馆，有好多好多各种各样我没有看过的书。我看书很慢。两个星期可能才能看完一本。所以贪心的想要看更多可是又来不及。想想哪一天可以到新加坡。五六年后就到了新加坡。找工作的时候有部分的时间在图书馆。第一份工作找到了就到图书馆签会员。大概45-46块。可是时间久了去也就越来越少了。工作很忙，也有很多新的东西要学要看。工作地方，巴士地铁要一个小时半才会到。有时候还是可以翻书的可是有点重。所以后来用电子书。应为有了工作给自己买了一个Samsung Note第一代。当时刚出的时候就很想买了。人生的第一个属于自己的智能手机。摔也不坏。拿起来还是一台手机。看书不是问题。玩游戏也不是问题。画画也不是问题。问题是没时间。害我坐过站的也是它。它还在我抽屉里。开不了了。可惜接下来的产品都没有第一代好。 说多了。其实我本来不是想说这个的。我刚刚签了Storytel。最近开始想看点书。所以就在Play book看书。翻了一个小时还没有找到想看的书。第二，价钱。有次买了，不久后它跌价！多过一半的价! 还有，买了可能不好看。不能换。剩下的是应为Google play我是用prepaid card买的。结果就没有在卖了。不知道security不好所以就没用卡。结果多不多少不少剩下两块多没有用。所以看哪一本书两块钱可以买。买了一本一块多的。应为不是一块就是三块。。。。两块的不好看。。。剩下不到一块买不到什么，就请Google喝半杯茶吧。毕竟我经常靠它。

 The worst part of all the tutorials is when after you have a follow through, then the end statement is like this is not the best in terms of security.....

Before I quit my last job, I was trying to learn Python and some Web development on my own. The progress was slow because every time I reached home, I had been rather tired to take in anything that I had read. Honestly, for Python, I started like around 2013 for my first job. Firstly, I used it to process some Document for me to read. I don't recall anything about it but the code works anyway. Learning has been futile because even though I know how to use, I probably has the least understanding on what's going on in the background. Secondly, I hope to process some data for data analysis with it but never use it and never had the time to complete it. There was this free basic course from Udacity. It used to be free and I used to be a frequent signed-up for those courses but hardly completed anything. Probably a few lessons for each of them or never even started. Come on, I spent 3 hours on transportation daily to travel to work and I only have 2GB data plan. The only ones that I...

I weighed myself after work with my bag pack. My bag is actually 5 kg. The total was actually my weight 3 years ago. I was taking steroid as part of the treatment for my skin allergies. I got an injection too. I was hungry all the time. I guess now the effect has worn out. I am feeling full most of the time and hungry at unexpected time. Imagine that 5 kgs used to be part of me... haha.. that's a lot of things. I learnt the importance of letting go. Seeing another person holding on to it, I was thinking how can I help. I guess it can't be helped if that was the situation another is facing all the time. I get out of it. I have somehow walked out of it. Sometimes, dancing in the midst of war. It wasn't because I was right for the way I treated things but I found it less stressful than when I used to hold on to things in the past. It doesn't change the situation but it did help me deal with it in a better way. More like, I am treating myself better this way. Holding on to ...

什么时后会结束。看我有多花心或是多懒惰。守护也不知道守的有没有用。如果没有，那守护来做什么。坐在风景还不错的地方等人上班。吃早餐。有两只鸟看着我吃。我跺脚一只不敢靠近。另外一只还走过来越走越近的看着我吃完。我跺脚的时候，眼睛还睁大的看着我。鸟，你很有性格。不知道你能活多久。会不会活到最后还是最早离开。如果你是人，会被人打死的。如果你遇到的不是我，你也会很惨的。幸好我没有你那么有性格。本来要给你拍一张照的。可是我一只手忙着吃早餐，一只手拿手机不方便，然后你太近了，角度换了拍了也不好看，没有拍。要不然你就出名了。

虽然不会到澳门。但是2016和2021的澳门是有差多少。听到澳门有点擦肩而过的感觉。我总是这样不过也好。距离的美。你是太阳。怕太近我会被烤焦的。熬夜的一天又过了。

擦肩而过

我只看得起假日🛌

累了可是我不想睡。。。不累的时候我又想睡。。。烦

Really have to check your transaction everytime you purchase something. I have been looking for some Levis jeans but couldn't get the size I want online. Today, I bought two but different types. The total was 20 dollars more. I am still sane enough to work two pants out before paying after a long day with stuck nose and a headache. The cashier assumed I had two same types and charged me the more expensive ones twice. Buy things leh, where can assume one. Normally I don't check.... Lucky today I did ask the price before paying.... 

Found a door that is "404 Not Found". I don't want to tell you where I found it. When I wasn't so heavy, I bought a jean it was too loose for me. End of last year, it was just nice, this year, it was a bit loose. I bought a new one with one size down, worried two size down would be too fitting. Just realise it is still a bit loose. The thing is my weight doesnt't change much. I ate Salad for a week, my weight still the same, probably went up a bit. I ate McD meals, it stays the same... so what's up with diet. Actually veges also got oil. otherwise where all the plant oil came from. 🤔 Maybe the weighing balance is broken.

😄🙈🫂

Watched Soul today... Good job people who were behind it... but life, there is no second chance. The second chance that everyone is hoping for. It doesn't exist.

I was eating at McD, then out of a sudden somebody just throw up and i think black out. I was thinking shall I help because obviously I dunno how to help.  Her friend is there and she almost sleep on the floor. They are both taller than I am. We all just look, not offering a hand. Then they helped her up to a chair. Maybe I shouldn't be a busybody and just walked out. I heard they are calling grab while on the way out. I guess I shouldn't have walked away because after that I was thinking how is she going to carry her friend out. The taxi's stop is super far away from the last time I grab one. On my way back, while in the mrt train, I couldn't stop thinking why I hadn't help her or ask if I could offer any help... This bug just stayed in my head. Guilt start swarming in... hmmm......

放下。

你不偷别人的可是别人来偷你的。然后你就去偷别人的。合理吗？我们的生命就是这样。我们只是在偷时间。不是钱。 我不知道自己可以去哪里。。。好象哪里都可以，可是又好象哪里都不可以。做什么都还可以，可是又好象都不可以。任何事情都花太多时间去平衡了。不是做得好就可以了。做得太好或做的不够好。。。要平衡有时候很难。 我想要的很简单。从来就不多。