2020

今看一个都是坑的email, 害我错过站。还两次。。。Harbourfront to Dhoby Ghaut, I missed. Switched at Little India. Little India to Dhoby Ghaut, missed again. I ended up at Chinatown. Then switch and finally I reached Dhoby Ghaut. I was reading this email that is full of clauses that no matter how many times I read, I just don't understand... hm... 我有一种冲动想甘愿不拿薪水了。要明白这个鬼email,让我饿死算了。好麻烦。

While I am wide awake, I opened up the code that I have been working on for a bit over a month to check something..... Just now, it's all red..... Next week, I am going to deploy it soon. That's terrifying until the red lines all gone... phew... it just took the program a while to load. I was blank for a while too at that moment thinking this is the end of my career as software engineer after a month and a half of being one... I wonder if I am good or bad actually on this new job. It feels unreal til this day.  I kept dreaming of lions and tigers coming into my old house at Miri and the locks or doors or gate were loose and I am not able to get them close, worry they attack anytime soon. Otherwise, it will be a big blue sky with either a moon that's very very big, or a night full of stars or seeing somebody flying in the sky with big wings or parachuting, or the sun set. But, whenever I tried to take a picture, my phone wouldn't work. The camera won't work at all. S...

陪我度过风风雨雨的卡。什么时候都在。好像是红卡到蓝卡才到金卡。积分换了一个drone和polaroid。可是要送人了。以后就剩电脑陪我。让它飞吧。在我的橱里太孤单。

早上出门，楼下坐着一个妈妈，孩子在玩，爸爸蹲在地上在羽球场的椅子上写作业。  我以前经常被罚，我想应该是我的爸爸不够努力帮我写作业。🤣

有的时候觉得已经理解了。可是每个人的理解范围不同。你的理解可能跟我的完全不一样可是听起来是一样的。把事情做好最重要。其他的我没办法。 前天太冷了。 我不觉得只有21度。感觉18。三更半夜被冷醒。不过不想起来。后来还是太冷了就多穿一件调tee。结果还是很冷。根本睡不好。昨天，我穿了一件Tee然后一件冷衣还有袜子才觉得刚刚好。今天一样冷冷的。还有一些事，还淋雨了。这几天mrt坐我旁边的一直咳嗽。我就一直鼻子敏感。每天三个小时。如果鼻子敏感又咳嗽，就会很可疑。淋雨了如果生病发烧不是更可疑吗。保佑我别给我这个麻烦。

很多时候我听过的歌和电视剧或电影有关。可是我大部分都没有看过。我是先听歌才看电视剧。有些是看了电视剧才听的，不过很少。来自以前听收音机的人。也不是能常听。想听的歌有时候也听不到。我买过的专辑也都不知道去哪里了。被人砸了，被人丢了。很多东西包括人是带不走的，也很容易失去。只有在心里的才是你的。留下的东西不多。我想如果哪一天要走了，我觉得是一种快乐和终于可以解脱的世界。只是是什么时候呢？如果人能像游戏一样有从来的机会，那会有多好。可是那是以前想的。现在的我只希望从来都没有。没有开始就不需要想从来。我想看透的人已经不在这个世上了吧。

I am always caught in a situation which i do not desire. run also cannot, stop also cannot, walk also cannot.... can i fly 🕊️🕊️🕊️ nope